Starting your morning with a high-protein food and a “dessert” — such as a doughnut or a slice of cake — may help you lose weight and keep it off, a new study suggests. True? Who can say? But, I am willing to volunteer to test that theory!

Fucking moron. I’m seriously rooting for the bear to turn around and rip a limb off. Asshole.

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I believe she also performed the ceremony, catered the reception and valet parked the cars.

..of watching Kate’s boobs bounce.

Ladies, and gentlemen that want a good guffaw, it is my extremely painful duty(pardon the wordplay – but it was intentional) to inform you that Gilbert Gottfried has been signed as the celebrity voice for the audio version of Fifty Shades of Grey. Arrrghhhh, don’t even listen it will ruin the books for you forever!! Ok, go ahead..but I warned you. *sob*

Ok and for those three of you who don’t even recognize the title of the book, it is basically a Harlequin romance style book with a few ‘spanky’ moments tossed in to make it appear that the book is about bdsm. In reality it appears to be written by a woman who normally writes cheesy romance books and decided to throw a few naughty sex words in. Then, after doing her reading homework, she scrawls the trilogy causing bored housewives across America think they want spanked.

Earlier this month, the term “zombie apocalypse” began flooding the digital space, prompted by a rash of bizarre national incidents involving gruesome cannibalism and flesh eating/throwing. The theme was so prevalent that the Center for Disease Control and Prevention felt compelled to ease people’s fears with an official statement.

So why then are sales of “zombie bullets” on the rise? Clever marketing. Even the CDC(Center for Disease Control & Prevention) is getting in on the act. Preparedness 101: Zombie Pandemic Buy your t-shirt here. Oh and, in case you are away from home, here is the android app.

The top 100 greatest horror movie quotes. shivers