Federal government is interested in research regarding an “ID bracelet” that potential airline passengers could wear that would contain personal information about them and, get this, also deliver an immobilizing shock to them if necessary!

Chinese man sticks 2008 needles in to his head to celebrate the Bejing Olympics. This tops his previous pin-heading-Guinness-World-Record count of one thousand, seven hundred and ninety.

Zombie boy.

Waiting for the worms.

Get ready to use duct tape to clean your hazardous waste from Mercury filled CFLs or the light-bulb police is gonna getcha. Congress :p

The deadliest blade since the Crysknife

But my PCs are all made in a plant in Sheboygan right? Sure.

Comedian George Carlin has died at age 71 from heart failure. Thanks for all the laughs, George. You will be missed.

You’re a man now, Seth! The family put a little something together for you. I swear they weren’t blotto or insane. Please don’t feel ashamed. Just slowly distance yourself from them if you can. It’ll be OK.

Worst Karaoke Session Ever – Watch more free videos

Well, at least it is when someone is reading an actual breakup letter dramatically, and you have the hilarious misspelled text in front of you to read along. Thankfully none of my exes were ever this half-illiterate. Too bad, as it could have been some comedy gold I would have been sharing, rather than the groovers over at YTMND!