There was a funny story a while back about a sexually frustrated husband who made a spreadsheet of all the excuses his wife gave him for not wanting to have sex. The this one from a sexually frustrated wife circulated as well. This whole spreadsheet thing seems like a humorous trend, but it’s really just showing how many couples get into a rut when it comes to their sex lives,
Yes, monogamy is hard, and even more so when you’re living together. Expectations run into the realities over everyday life, and that can then lead to even more problems as legitimate reasons to pass on sex might be misinterpreted. Then the death spiral starts and sex becomes the exception to the rule. While single guys are out trolling for escorts and babes at the bars and online, married guys and guys in a committed relationship have to deal with the dry spots.
I think the problem for many of them is just laziness. Who wants to work for sex? Isn’t that supposed to be one of the advantages of having a regular partner? Yes, and now. For some couples this works great, but for many others it can become a real problem, and it sometimes destroys the entire relationship.
Here’s a tip for the guys that many knew when they were single but then forgot after they settled into a relationship or marriage – romance matters! If you start acting like you’re entitled to sex or you’re not willing to put any work into it whatsoever, then you’re going to create this problem or make it much worse. Do you remember things like flowers or date night? Do you ever just flirt with your wife, especially when you’re not necessarily expecting sex?
Put some effort into it every once in a while, and that effort will pay off in spades!
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